{"id":8440,"date":"2023-08-19T17:32:14","date_gmt":"2023-08-19T17:32:14","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/farefwd.com\/?p=8440"},"modified":"2024-03-11T20:34:11","modified_gmt":"2024-03-11T20:34:11","slug":"not-beyond-help","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/farefwd.com\/index.php\/2023\/08\/19\/not-beyond-help\/","title":{"rendered":"Not Beyond Help"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t
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Not Beyond Help<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t
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By Casie Dodd<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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Lancaster Dodd: Is this booze you make poison?<\/em>
Freddie Quell: Not if you drink it smart.<\/em><\/p>

Much has been said about leaving church. There are plenty of memoirs written by people raised in devout Christian homes who left the faith for various reasons: hypocrisy, abuse, intellectual disagreement. While this story can sometimes be told well, I worry that the voices who speak the loudest can overshadow others who don\u2019t quite fit this narrative. Why must the natural conclusion, to many, seem to be to give it all up\u2014to cut religion out of your life and universally dismiss its value? Why does so much of this process\u2014whether labeled \u201cdeconstruction\u201d or \u201cfalling away\u201d\u2014seem defined by negation? In addition to published books by former Christians of various stripes, online I\u2019ve seen a number of people I would otherwise respect declare organized religion as \u201csilly\u201d or otherwise misguided. This lack of empathy makes me feel a little smaller and leaves me tempted to keep myself quiet. There is not enough space for people like me: who simply stopped going to church (for a time) because they no longer could but knew they still had to believe in something. But there are many of us: the halfhearted \u201cexvangelicals\u201d who resisted the term yet could not find anywhere new to build, or belong.<\/p>

For several years, I tried to feel more comfortable around non-religious people than among the Christians who raised me. Coming from a place of deep hurt\u2014like many, I suspect, who feel the need to make such agnostic proclamations\u2014I needed to learn whether I could appear human to people outside of church. I never saw myself as experiencing a period of \u201cdoubt,\u201d exactly, so much as one of trying to navigate the limits of how far grace could be discovered this side of heaven. Growing up (very conservative) Southern Baptist and spending college primarily connected to a (generally liberal) Presbyterian community before spending a year living with (all-over-the-place) Catholics, when the time came to \u201cmake my faith my own\u201d\u2014as I was always taught to do\u2014I no longer had an easily decipherable guide. In each tradition along the way, I found glimpses of holiness while also encountering people who distorted or otherwise strained how I understood the role of the Church. Where my family saw me being \u201cled astray\u201d by the \u201cwrong\u201d kind of Christians, I simply felt I\u2019d met too many of them to know where I fit anymore. And I carried wounds from people who meant to protect me that I could not possibly share with anyone. Unable to determine what to do with this conviction, I withdrew inside myself after conversations with spiritual mentors proved less than helpful: \u201cYou can\u2019t just give up on it because you\u2019re having a hard time.\u201d \u201cYou just have to get up on Sundays, put yourself together, and go: you\u2019re better than that.\u201d <\/em>In each case, they were partly right, but the lack of empathy did more damage than I think they could have realized.<\/p>

It was around that same time that I started going to movies alone. In Chicago\u2014where I lived and worked in a Catholic soup kitchen but almost never went to church\u2014there was always an open theater, always something to see. That year,\u00a0The Master<\/em>\u00a0(2012) premiered and when I saw it, I was transported. My conclusions were not what many seemed to suspect in my outward actions; I did not decide that institutional religion was inevitably cultish or misguided. Instead, the movie\u2014aided by brilliant acting and a compelling, if at times confusing, storyline\u2014provided an odd consolation that I would somehow eventually find my way back.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t

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I needed to learn whether I could appear human to people outside of church.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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For those unfamiliar with the Paul Thomas Anderson film, The Master<\/em> follows Freddie Quell (Joaquin Phoenix), a Navy WWII veteran left with PTSD and no support system as he attempts to find a place to belong after the war. After several missteps, he discovers a cult community, The Cause (loosely based on Scientology), led by \u201cMaster\u201d Lancaster Dodd (Philip Seymour Hoffman), and they develop an intense friendship that bears difficult consequences for them both.<\/p>

Freddie serves as an endlessly fascinating case study in our often-thwarted attempts to build community\u2014religious or otherwise. I\u2019ve lost track of how many times I\u2019ve seen The Master<\/em> and it only becomes more powerful each time. Viewed from a limiting perspective\u2014or in the case of some of The Cause\u2019s members, with a warped religious attitude\u2014Freddie seems \u201cbeyond help,\u201d as Peggy (Amy Adams), wife of The Master, proclaims. Zealously committed to their movement, she becomes intensely antagonistic toward any perceived threat or attack, and for her, Freddie comes to represent the potential downfall of her husband. This attitude is not entirely without basis: Freddie is at best crass and at worst, violent and otherwise out-of-control. His introduction to Lancaster centers on the discovery of one of Freddie\u2019s makeshift \u201cpotions,\u201d as Lancaster calls them\u2014alcoholic beverages concocted from whatever materials (whether safe to drink to not) that Freddie can find at hand. His previous attempts to share drinks with people he might care about\u2014other seamen, an almost-girlfriend, fellow itinerant workers\u2014have not ended well for him, so Lancaster\u2019s affirmation becomes a critical opportunity for communion as Freddie\u2019s own personal crises are reaching a breaking point. The Eucharistic overtones of such a drinking scene\u2014two of which bookend a wedding feast\u2014do not require elaboration. When Freddie and Lancaster initiate this bond, they become part of each other.<\/p>

This connection, like all human relationships, is fragile. Freddie\u2019s motivations seem unclear in some ways, though it appears that his desire for community\u2014to be part of a cause (if not necessarily The Cause) is genuine. Almost without fail, his attempts to help contribute lead to disaster. Rather than discourage Lancaster, however, it only further fuels his conviction that Freddie needs saving. At the same time, as the story evolves we become increasingly aware of the ways in which Master himself reflects many of Freddie\u2019s flaws. For example, Lancaster frames Freddie\u2019s fixation on sex and brute physicality as being \u201canimal,\u201d a repulsive characteristic that he must help him learn to control\u2014but we come to learn that Lancaster struggles with similar proclivities. All of his efforts to remain superior end in rage-filled outbursts or other unnerving signs that his supposed \u201cpeace\u201d is not as strong as he claims. Is this hypocrisy? Abuse of power? Or does it enable him better to empathize with Freddie? Is it all of them? I\u2019m not sure there is supposed to be a singular answer, which is one of the many complexities in unraveling the \u201cmysteries\u201d of faith.<\/p>

Such signs of brokenness in The Cause only increase as the movie progresses, though refreshingly, Anderson does not give excessive attention to these parts of the narrative. We have enough real-life models to understand the warning signs: this is a \u201cchurch\u201d that will not ultimately save its flock. However, the fact that Anderson seems less interested in this aspect of the story than in the relationship between Freddie and Master\u2014and really, most interested in how Freddie experiences it\u2014signals where our attention should be drawn. It is not a story about abstract institutions, universal religious creeds, or even blind faith, but about how such forces become manifest in individual lives, and how we respond to them.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t

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It is not a story about abstract
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The film\u2019s structure helps us navigate how we might follow Freddie\u2019s journey. We learn several things early: Freddie\u2019s service in the Pacific, his tendency toward crudeness, his \u201cnervous condition\u201d from the war. He appears untethered as he tries two completely different jobs\u2014the first in a respectable department store, the second near the Mexico border as an itinerant farm worker. He is essentially without family, whether by death or by estrangement. Each of these layers provides a narrative that cannot be fully understood by someone focused on his outward behavior or his inability to conform to religious dogma. Though Anderson gives us an initial glimpse of Freddie\u2019s sexuality in rather crass terms, we also quickly see him attempt an actual connection with a female coworker at the department store\u2014he does respect her boundaries and shares one of his mystery concoctions with her, the initial sign for Freddie of an attempt at communion. Freddie is never presented as a simple deviant or a destructive force, but rather as a testament to how such forces have wreaked spiritual havoc on him. It takes time and attention to see these deeper human elements to Freddie\u2019s problems\u2014attention that only Lancaster seems fully willing and able to provide.<\/p>

This connection between them is first depicted through what begins as an \u201cinformal processing\u201d session, in which Lancaster asks Freddie a series of intimate questions that force him to confront his secrets and deepest anxieties. His honesty leads Lancaster to say, \u201cYou are the bravest boy I\u2019ve ever met.\u201d Freddie is many things, but he is always open with Lancaster\u2014to a degree that makes him uniquely vulnerable to the problems related to The Cause. Whereas the other characters either passively follow their leader or become increasingly zealous about their mission, Freddie grows more committed while still struggling to fix the cracks in his humanity\u2014a goal made only less realistic in the context of a cult centered on achieving human perfection.<\/p>

At the same time, Freddie\u2019s ability to read other people serves him well, even as it ultimately makes it impossible for him to remain a member of The Cause. This decision makes his brief reunion with Lancaster near the end of the film even more heartbreaking; the connection is no less real for its impossibility. They both sense this intuitively\u2014communicating cryptically, with tears streaming down Freddie\u2019s face as Lancaster croons a love song solo. More than anything, Freddie wants to belong\u2014to be able to give back to Lancaster what he\u2019s been given. The knowledge that he can\u2019t brings him immense grief even as he hopes to build what could become a meaningful life of his own.<\/p>

In that same scene, Peggy briefly confronts Freddie\u2019s lack of devotion to The Cause. When she accuses him of looking unwell, Freddie becomes defensive and responds, \u201cThat\u2019s not how I look. I don\u2019t look like that\u201d\u2014not to disagree but to dismiss her belief that he could look otherwise. Then, asking him, \u201cYou can\u2019t take this life straight, can you?\u201d without a hint of compassion in her voice, Peggy dismisses his presence as \u201cpointless\u201d and leaves him alone with Lancaster. Seeing him as an obstacle to the movement\u2014which increasingly seems to have become a cause that belongs more to her than to her husband\u2014Peggy cannot see Freddie\u2019s need. She misinterprets his failure to fit into their culture as a failure to believe in anything, as a threat to her community.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t

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Our joys and struggles must be shared in order to simultaneously inhabit and transcend our own brokenness.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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Perhaps she is right, but she\u2019s also quite wrong. In the end, The Master<\/em> leaves us with a clue for how we can understand Freddie\u2019s spiritual evolution. After leaving Lancaster for good, Freddie wanders into an English bar, picks up a girl, and ends up in bed with her. Although it might appear crude or otherwise without much meaning, they are experiencing what seems to be true intimacy\u2014a first for Freddie within the events of the movie. They are in it together, and he even begins asking her questions similar to that early scene between him and Lancaster. He shares a connection that does not negate his humanness but finds a way to commune with another person in a way he can express authentically. As in the case of faith, it cannot ultimately be experienced alone, even though it is an intensely personal experience. Our joys and struggles must be shared in order to simultaneously inhabit and transcend our own brokenness.<\/p>

When I found myself moving closer to Catholicism, the process of conversion was both peaceful and painful\u2014a magnetic force bringing me toward what I knew had always been my calling yet forced the loss of most of the faith I had always known. Much like Freddie knew he had to find something else that he could make his own, I have found that\u2014once again, by the grace of God\u2014within the Church. But I know the pain of wanting to shed the burden of belief. Like Freddie (and maybe Lancaster, too), I know how it feels to be hurt by the people who have also tried to help.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t

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Casie Dodd<\/strong> lives in Arkansas with her husband and two children. Recent work has appeared in<\/em> The Windhover, Oxford American, Front Porch Republic, Arkansas Review, and other journals. Based in Fort Smith, she is the Founder and Publisher of Belle Point Press, a regional small press celebrating the literary culture and community of the American Mid-South.<\/em><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

How a 2012 movie about a cult and a homeless veteran offered me reassurance that I would find my way back to church.
\nBy Casie Dodd<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":69,"featured_media":8443,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"elementor_header_footer","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"ocean_front_end_style_editor":"no","ocean_post_layout":"","ocean_both_sidebars_style":"","ocean_both_sidebars_content_width":0,"ocean_both_sidebars_sidebars_width":0,"ocean_sidebar":"0","ocean_second_sidebar":"0","ocean_disable_margins":"enable","ocean_add_body_class":"","ocean_shortcode_before_top_bar":"","ocean_shortcode_after_top_bar":"","ocean_shortcode_before_header":"","ocean_shortcode_after_header":"","ocean_has_shortcode":"","ocean_shortcode_after_title":"","ocean_shortcode_before_footer_widgets":"","ocean_shortcode_after_footer_widgets":"","ocean_shortcode_before_footer_bottom":"","ocean_shortcode_after_footer_bottom":"","ocean_display_top_bar":"default","ocean_display_header":"default","ocean_header_style":"","ocean_center_header_left_menu":"0","ocean_custom_header_template":"0","ocean_custom_logo":0,"ocean_custom_retina_logo":0,"ocean_custom_logo_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_tablet_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_mobile_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_max_height":0,"ocean_custom_logo_tablet_max_height":0,"ocean_custom_logo_mobile_max_height":0,"ocean_header_custom_menu":"0","ocean_menu_typo_font_family":"0","ocean_menu_typo_font_subset":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_size":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_unit":"px","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight_tablet":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight_mobile":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform_tablet":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform_mobile":"","ocean_menu_typo_line_height":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_unit":"","ocean_menu_typo_spacing":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_unit":"","ocean_menu_link_color":"","ocean_menu_link_color_hover":"","ocean_menu_link_color_active":"","ocean_menu_link_background":"","ocean_menu_link_hover_background":"","ocean_menu_link_active_background":"","ocean_menu_social_links_bg":"","ocean_menu_social_hover_links_bg":"","ocean_menu_social_links_color":"","ocean_menu_social_hover_links_color":"","ocean_disable_title":"default","ocean_disable_heading":"default","ocean_post_title":"","ocean_post_subheading":"","ocean_post_title_style":"","ocean_post_title_background_color":"","ocean_post_title_background":0,"ocean_post_title_bg_image_position":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_attachment":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_repeat":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_size":"","ocean_post_title_height":0,"ocean_post_title_bg_overlay":0.5,"ocean_post_title_bg_overlay_color":"","ocean_disable_breadcrumbs":"default","ocean_breadcrumbs_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_separator_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_links_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_links_hover_color":"","ocean_display_footer_widgets":"default","ocean_display_footer_bottom":"default","ocean_custom_footer_template":"0","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"ocean_post_oembed":"","ocean_post_self_hosted_media":"","ocean_post_video_embed":"","ocean_link_format":"","ocean_link_format_target":"self","ocean_quote_format":"","ocean_quote_format_link":"post","ocean_gallery_link_images":"off","ocean_gallery_id":[],"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[48,82],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-8440","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-archives","category-issue-28","entry","has-media"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/farefwd.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/07\/AdobeStock_301129520-Converted.jpg?fit=576%2C423&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/farefwd.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8440","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/farefwd.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/farefwd.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/farefwd.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/69"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/farefwd.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8440"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/farefwd.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8440\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9188,"href":"https:\/\/farefwd.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8440\/revisions\/9188"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/farefwd.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/8443"}],"wp:atta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